Tuesday, June 30, 2009

I hate critics, because I am one.

I hated the new Transformers movie, there, I said it. I know that is akin to saying I don't like Lady GaGa or I don't care much for hot dogs, but only the first one is true. I am now going to have to count out why I didn't like it.

1. Length: My pet peeve in a movie is when a director takes a 90 minute plot and makes it a 150 minute movie. Gratuitous is an understatement.

2. Needless Love Story: I think the "I love you game" played between the two characters was wicked retarded.

3. Cussing: When you are making a movie that you KNOW will be seen by plenty of kids, do not throw in all the cuss words you know for the sake of it. It was not needed in the first one, why now. If you want all the cussing, please don't put toys in Happy Meals.

4. Male Thongs: Need I say more?

5. Black men with dumb one liners: Black men need not be cast in an all white movie if you intend to only make him say "this looks bad" or "this day just got worse." Really?

6. Genre confusion: This was a perfectly acceptable action flick, awesome effects, fight scenes, metallic gore. That being said, they tried to make this movie funny... F... A... I... L... fail fail fail.

Okay, I am done, for now.


Anonymous said...


Welcome back.


Anonymous said...

I say: bring back the cartoon version!