Tuesday, December 25, 2007

Christmas Morning Photos

Brent, enjoying lotion on his chapped hands (photo credit: Jon Bradshaw C.2007, lotion: Lori Andrew)

Jon, opening his mom's box o'prizes (photo credit: Amanda Bradshaw C.2007, UNCC Santa Hat: Tim & Sara Smith, Wallet: Linda Malady)

Amanda, opening her bags of bag! (photo credit: Jon Bradshaw C.2007, Life Is Good Back : Tim & Sara Smith)

Monday, December 17, 2007

The Charlie Brown Christmas Tree

So after a very short 4 hour shift at the Gap, Amanda and I headed home for a quick bite. We then headed out in search of the Christmas Tree for the Christmas Play... okay, just for our living room. After Linus and Lucy rocked it out, we ended up with....

So we began with the lights.. of the four strands we put on our tree two years ago (last year, our stuff was in a moving van on Christmas Day) we only used two. All five feet of this tree is surrounded by my Christmas Train. Aww, look at me smile.

Amanda and I put the final touches on the tree, that last ornament she put on there made it topple over, so we had to take it off. Kidding really. We also have our Santa and Frosty lights around the window.

Sunday, December 16, 2007



This week: 1lb
Total Loss: 18lbs

Tuesday, December 11, 2007

Making Smart Decisions

Not really my strength the last two days...

"Oh but Jon, you are brilliant, how could you possibly go wrong." the IWBUAM Blog Readers reply.

"Well, even MENSA members like myself can Bush things up a little bit." Jon types with a smile, you see, to "Bush something up" is like taking FUBAR one step further.

My dear readers, allow me to point out 4+ examples of bad calls I have made over the last two days.

1. In lieu of getting off my duff while in the GAP break room, I instead reached up from my seat to remove my soup from the microwave. This is an especially bad idea when the soup is about 400 degrees and it runs down your arm. Three or four gauze bandages later and some burn-cream... it still freaking hurts. According to webmd.com, I have the visual signs of a 2nd degree burn on the side of my arm.

2. Monday morning, I wore running shoes to work... this is a two part mistake.
A. I don't think any male above the age of 12 should ever be allowed to wear tennis shoes with non-jean pants.... ever. Nothing says "my name is Forrest, Forrest Gump" like a grown man in bright sneakers with some freshly pressed Khaki pants. I was lazy and wanting to be comfy. Of course, the snow left on the ground here by the shore was nice and melted, 8 miles north of here, where my store is, there was a mushy 2 inches of slush covering all surfaces. Those who know me well know that I do NOT like my feet to be wet.
B. The same principle compounds this mistake when combined with bad decision #3.

3. So as the wet-foot wonder is heading home from work I have to pick up my Seattle Sutton's food for the week. The lady that distributes the food hounds you after 6pm so she can try to close before the 6:30pm closing time. On my to-do list was to mail some recently e-Bay'd goods, get gas, get food... the bad decision was made in the order in which I chose to complete my to-do list. Oh, I mailed my stuff, and two blocks north of Seattle Suttons, sputter sputter putt putt dead! With 19 miles DTE (distance til empty) left on the display, the Mini called it a day. Shit, of course Betsy would leave right after I picked my stuff up so there was no help there. 28 degrees, snow / ice covered sidewalks, and 2+ miles to the nearest gas pump... shoes mattered. I trekked on to buy a gas can, wet the Mini's whistle, and fill the tank up.

4. I got home and ate dinner, thawed a little bit, then went downstairs with a load of laundry to complete. As I heard the door close behind me at the bottom of the stairwell and I looked toward the door that lets you in the laundry room was to my front, I realized that the key to both was safely in the apartment. Sons of the Bitches I say with a hopeless smile!!! I have only done this one other time, when I had pneumonia in March, and I did what I did then... climbed the 12 foot cage and over the 2nd story rail to get to my apartment. I hope no thieves were taking notes.

Monday, December 10, 2007


Lost 4 lbs this week.
Lost 17 lbs thus far.

Wednesday, December 05, 2007

Things you need to live in Chicago...

besides a healthy appetite.

Snow Boots

Snow Brush / Scraper

Long & Warm Coat

Poor Amanda was missing all three, I was missing the brush. I am guessing I left mine in the 4Runner when I sold it. We got around 4-5 inches of snow during the evening and over night. After we went to the Magnificent Mile to go shopping, it began to snow again.

Jon in front of the Chicago River.

Amanda in front of Water Tower Place... in the background is the John Hancock Building.

Amanda on Hinman Avenue... home sweet snowy home.

Snow Shenanigans!!!

Amanda, my little snow angel!

Jon lining up on the left (right to the viewer) track... on your mark.... get set......


.... and his lovely wife lining up in the right lane.... on your mark.... get set.....


Monday, December 03, 2007


White Trash in Review

The white trash birthday party was a blast... thank you Rebecca for aging and allowing us to come.

The day started unlike any other, well, with snow, a good two inches of snow. We forgot to take pictures but when Jenni e-mails me some, I promise to post them. We headed off in the Mini Cooper off-road edition to plow through the snow. First stop, Salvation Army. There we picked through some very nice clothes to get into the white trash mood. One difference we noted was that we could not find ANY nascar shirts... wow!

Selecting the wardrobe was tough, first me. I still have my BDU pants from when I was in AFROTC in college. They are so comfy and I hadn't worn them in a while, I was going to rock those out. I had to make sure that my top communicated the trashiness of my being white. I selected a lovely, ashe gray "You don't know me: witness protection program." Complete with stains in the armpits, dingy stains on the front, and I customized it with holes and rips added. Classy! You can take the boy from North Carolina, you caint take the North Carolina out of the boy.

Amanda's wardrobe had no foundation, we could start anywhere. I was leaning towards the moo moo & hair curlers look for my bride. We found in the racks of clothes, a sweet puffy paint splattered t-shirt. With this shirt, we had to find something to wear. Trying in vein to find some acid wash jeans to rock out with the puffy paint shirt, we chose some white windsuit pants with a pink stripe. Amanda spiffed up the look with a drastic overuse of eye shadow and dark lipstick. She looked like she could have won Miss Turn Four at Lowes Motor Speedway.

We decided to change at the party, not to dare the train ride in our White Trash Wear. As we went to Lincoln Park and walked up the stairs of a gorgeous 3-flat, opened the door to a notebook paper sign indicating the way. The garland of beer cans snaking up the stairs led us to a porn covered door. Walking in to a pregnant prom queen birthday girl and mom in curlers made me miss NC just a little bit. It was a lot of fun, people were in various levels of hillbilly wear from hunting gear, nascar shirts, one guy had a NC State shirt and thought that made him a hillbilly. I informed him that rednecks and white trash are usually tarheel fans (I love you David!). We played drinking games and enjoyed PBR on tap. We had a great time, we changed back, made the train home, and worked today. Ye Haw Y'all.

Saturday, December 01, 2007

Let It Snow Let It Snow Let It Snow

Yah, we have our first snow (that sticks) of the year!!! It is switching over to sleet now, so that sucks.

Tonight we are going to a "White Trash" birthday party. We went through the local salvation army but boy it would do us some good to be back in Charlotte. We could not find any tobacco or nascar shorts.

Pictures will follow.